Is there anything Mario Can't do?

We all know Mario as being a famous plumber (though, we never seen him do any plumbing) and he's been known that way ever since Super Mario Bros but what else has he been doing? He's been doing so much in his life within the past 27 years, so lets just take a look of what he's done! The list is not in order.

(don't take this seriously)

A Referee
Mario just had to give this a shot... there was so many people who wanted that spot, but due to Mario's popularity, they asked him to become a referee. Luigi was pissed that Mario was chosen over him.

A Doctor
I don't know why but Nintendo just had to make Mario a Doctor but Mario was never licensed to be one. Oh sure, the game was licensed by Nintendo but that doesn't mean he had a licensed to perform anything on anyone. Thank god all his procedures were a success... well... except for one of the Toads but who cares about him. All he said was to mario "Thank you Mario! But the Princess is in another Castle."

A carpenter
Before Mario was that famous plumber, he was known as a carpenter. But due to the fact he didn't do much on the job he was fired because he kept using the accuse that his girlfriend was captured by a big ape which they thought he was just making up stories so he can take time off work.

A Hotel Worker
Another one of the jobs Mario completely failed at. All he did on his job was shutting doors... He was then fired quickly because anyone can do that job.

A Tennis Player
Now to something he's good at but who know he was so good at it. After I was playing tennis, I was doing so awesome that I beat the champ of all the leagues and then I see Mario is the undefeated champ. So I traveled to the Mushroom Kingdom just to play him in a few rounds. He was extremely tough to beat but I have managed to beat him. So, when Mario is not trying to save the Princess, he's out playing some sports.

A pinball
Mario, a pinball? Mario just had to try it out because he was jealous that kirby and sonic were pinballs and they can't be the only guys to become a pinball. After he gave it a go, all his bones got messed up inside and had to go see a doctor to get him back to shape. Though, since Mario couldn't operate on himself, he had to go see Dr. Lobe.

A golf player
Mario's been playing golf for quite a long time and has became a master of the game just like he mastered Tennis. The first tournament he went in was the NES open. Luigi also went with him to try it out but Mario became much better than him that Luigi made sure he went missing.

A victim
After Luigi got mad at Mario he told Bowser where Mario will be and have him captured. After Mario was captured, it spread through out the Mushroom kingdom and if no one found Mario that they would have to put Luigi in charge of saving the castle and fighting scary bosses. Now, Luigi is scared of ghosts and big monsters so he quickly lost his temper and went out to save Mario by traveling all over the world to talk to people just to find him. Luigi then saves him and Mario got mad at Luigi and kicked him out of a lot of games which is why you don't see him much as Mario.

A time traveler
Bowser wanted to go back in time making sure Mario was never born so he may rule the mushroom kingdom a lot easier. Mario found out about his plan and got a time machine to stop him but he had to go through a lot of boring crap to do so. Mario almost gave up because he thought, "I have to go through all this crap just to save myself." Well, he finds Bowser and stops him from trying to get rid of him but Bowser was only kidding about trying to get rid of him...

A teacher!
Back then, since a lot of kids loved Mario, Mario felt like he should help kids in some way so he became a teacher to teach kids how to type. Mario actually became a good teacher but the kids grew bored of typing and decided not to come to class. Soon after, Mario was fired and was told to stick to his plumbing job.

A lottery guy?
This was a big big shock to everyone that Mario had a gambling addiction. Mario just kept playing the lottery all the time and couldn't stop. No wonder there was a casino building in Super Mario RPG. Mario just wanted to go gamble instead of saving the Mushroom Kingdom. It all makes perfect sense!

A soccer Player
Mario had to try out some new sports besides tennis and golf, he then tried soccer! I've never watched Mario play soccer so I can't tell you how great he was, I was too busy watching Zelda, Peach, and Samus at a strip joint. I'm sure he was good though. :)

A baseball player
Before trying out some good old soccer, Mario tried some baseball, the all American sport! I've seen him hit so many home runs that he was the next Babe Ruth... I almost caught one his fly balls but it hit me in the... well, lets just say it hit me where it hurts the most. Mario was tested positive for mushroom use which of course everyone knew about but they still put him in, in the first place.

A basketball player
Whoever said white man can't jump didn't know Mario. Mario has tried so many sports as I mentioned above that he just had to try it out just so he can become one of the great basket ball players as Michael Jordan, Shaq, and Larry Bird. Even Peach just had to give it a go so she can show woman that men aren't the only ones who can play the game!

A party man
Mario a party dude? You bet! Mario, Peach, Luigi, Yoshi, Wario, Waluigi, Donkey Kong and more all participated in the games trying to become the party master! This time Mario couldn't be the best all the time because the others actually were better in a lot of the games than Mario so he had to really try in those party games. Mario was mad when they stole all his stars away from him in the chance game.

An athlete
Well, we all know Mario probably would of done this sooner or later but Mario just had to show sonic up by showing he's not the the only guy who can run extremely fast. So Mario took more time off from being the hero and he took as many shooms as he could and start training for the Olympics but end up being kicked out of that too because everyone knows if you beat sonic in a race, you have to eat a lot of shrooms.

A street cleaner
We finally get to see mario actually work. Shadow Mario aka Baby Bowser has pretended to be him so when Mario was on Vacation and traveled to the island, Mario was thrown in Jail (Hope he didn't drop the soap). The next day they had him clean all the dirt. And peach was captured again later on blah blab blah. But we finally get to see Mario do a real job. :)

A space traveler
Peach captured again, nothing new. But this time Mario has to head to space... But how does Mario breath in space without an oxygen tank? Must be a special shroom he takes. :)

A Dancer
Mario got jealous that xbox had a good thing to be in it but he couldn't leave Nintendo do join in on their game so he wrote Nintendo that he wanted him and his friends to have a dancing game of their own. Who ever said a white guy can't dance didn't know Mario! Mario can do it all!

A kart racer
Mario's been driving since he was 16 and he loves to race but everytime he races, he gets a golden ticket (no, not to see willy wonka). He gathered a few friends and made their own race tracks that they can race on and soon more friends wanted in. Mario loves throwing turtle shells at the other drivers but one time there was an accident and the koopa was killed by a shell but then replaced by Toad.

A piece of paper
We all know Mario is a good fighter but then he turns himself into Origami and so did Bowser and Peach... If Bowser were smart, he would've come after Mario with a pair of scissors, but he didn't. Mario succeeds yet again, showing that paper can in fact break blocks?

What will Mario become next? We'll just have wait and see...

Hope you enjoyed this and please comment if I need to change anything to make it sound better. Took me about 2+ hours to write this.